Ever since I first heard Carly Rae Jepsen's song, I wanted to write a doxie version, and inspiration finally struck me (to the tune of "Call Me Maybe"):
You wished for a new doggie,
You said you’d love a doxie,
You went right out and bought me,
Now I won’t do what you say!
You tell me sit and I stand,
You beg, yell and demand,
But I don’t give a goddamn,
‘Cause I won’t do what you say.
My stare is holdin’
Chewed shoes, teeth are growin’
Night comes I’m still barkin’
What you think you’re doing doggie?
Hey, you’re my master,
And this is crazy,
But if you ask nice,
I’ll obey you maybe!
Look so cute ‘nuff to,
Drive you crazy,
And if you ask twice,
I’ll obey you maybe!
Hey, you’re my master,
And this is crazy,
But if you ask nice,
I’ll obey you maybe!
And all the other dogs,
They aren’t like me,
They do what they’re told,
Me it’s just maybe.
You take your time training me,
I eat whatever I see,
And only inside go pee,
I have to have my way.
I look for items to steal,
I make them into my meal,
I act like what’s the big deal,
And I won’t do what you say!
My stare is holdin’
Chewed shoes, teeth are growin’
Night comes I’m still barkin’
What you think you’re doing doggie?
Hey, you’re my master,
And this is crazy,
But if you ask nice,
I’ll obey you maybe!
Look so cute ‘nuff to,
Drive you crazy,
And if you ask twice,
I’ll obey you maybe!
Hey, you’re my master,
And this is crazy,
But if you ask nice,
I’ll obey you maybe!
And all the other dogs,
They aren’t like me,
They do what they’re told,
Me it’s just maybe.
Before I came into your life,
You had it so good,
You had it so good,
Noone chewed on your wood.
And then I came into your life,
I pooped on your rug,
Barfed up big ughs,
Deep holes I dug’n’re-dug.
Look so cute ‘nuff to,
Drive you crazy,
And if you ask twice,
I’ll obey you maybe!
Hey, you’re my master,
And this is crazy,
But if you ask nice,
I’ll obey you maybe!
And all the other dogs,
They aren’t like me,
They do what they’re told,
Me it’s just maybe.
And then I came into your life,
I pooped on your rug,
Barfed up big ughs,
Big holes I dug’n’re-dug.
And then I came into your life,
You love me so much,
And I do know that,
I’ll obey you maybe!
You wished for a new doggie,
You said you’d love a doxie,
You went right out and bought me,
Now I won’t do what you say!
You tell me sit and I stand,
You beg, yell and demand,
But I don’t give a goddamn,
‘Cause I won’t do what you say.
My stare is holdin’
Chewed shoes, teeth are growin’
Night comes I’m still barkin’
What you think you’re doing doggie?
Hey, you’re my master,
And this is crazy,
But if you ask nice,
I’ll obey you maybe!
Look so cute ‘nuff to,
Drive you crazy,
And if you ask twice,
I’ll obey you maybe!
Hey, you’re my master,
And this is crazy,
But if you ask nice,
I’ll obey you maybe!
And all the other dogs,
They aren’t like me,
They do what they’re told,
Me it’s just maybe.
You take your time training me,
I eat whatever I see,
And only inside go pee,
I have to have my way.
I look for items to steal,
I make them into my meal,
I act like what’s the big deal,
And I won’t do what you say!
My stare is holdin’
Chewed shoes, teeth are growin’
Night comes I’m still barkin’
What you think you’re doing doggie?
Hey, you’re my master,
And this is crazy,
But if you ask nice,
I’ll obey you maybe!
Look so cute ‘nuff to,
Drive you crazy,
And if you ask twice,
I’ll obey you maybe!
Hey, you’re my master,
And this is crazy,
But if you ask nice,
I’ll obey you maybe!
And all the other dogs,
They aren’t like me,
They do what they’re told,
Me it’s just maybe.
Before I came into your life,
You had it so good,
You had it so good,
Noone chewed on your wood.
And then I came into your life,
I pooped on your rug,
Barfed up big ughs,
Deep holes I dug’n’re-dug.
Look so cute ‘nuff to,
Drive you crazy,
And if you ask twice,
I’ll obey you maybe!
Hey, you’re my master,
And this is crazy,
But if you ask nice,
I’ll obey you maybe!
And all the other dogs,
They aren’t like me,
They do what they’re told,
Me it’s just maybe.
And then I came into your life,
I pooped on your rug,
Barfed up big ughs,
Big holes I dug’n’re-dug.
And then I came into your life,
You love me so much,
And I do know that,
I’ll obey you maybe!
